It's not the end... Is it?

OK everyone, this blog may be a little different than my usual ones. It is particularly directed to those who have parents who may have been or who are getting divorce.
First question: how DOES or DID that make you feel?
My parents are kinda on the verge but are willing to give it time. at first when I heard the news I was kinda like, "GOOD I'm tired of this crap!!!", but now that they are pretty serious about it, I feel like my world is crashing down.
Second question: What do I do?
I would love to hear your advice.
Peace and Love

This is Me

Why can't you see this is who I want to be.
I won't ever reach your expectations
Even though I strive with all my determination
Let me go, Let me be,
I am about to take off, Fly above the trees

This is MY choice
Sorry to ruin your plans
Why won't you look and see who I am

I'm gonna fly
Gonna be somebody
I can be anybody I want to be
'Cuz this is Me

I remember when i was young
With pigtails and curls
Knowing if I just tried I could conquer the world
You raised me up on your shoulders
told me to reach for the stars.
And no that I am you are putting up bars

I know I am your baby girl
But you have to let me go
I NEED to learn to face this world on my own.

I'm gonna fly
Gonna be somebody
I can be anybody I want to be
'Cuz this is Me

I know you love me
Want me to be all I can be
But I need you to see

That this is my choice
I'm raising my voice
I'm breaking free,
Gonna fly high above these trees
I need you to see
that this is what's best for me
This can make me happy

'Cuz this is ME.

She is MY hero...

She is my hero...

She gave me life, physically AND spiritually
She gave me happiness and realism (which doesn't always come in the same package)
She braided my hair and dressed me for school.
She walked with me, even when she didn't have the strength to stand.
She has been my support and my shadow, even when it is OBVIOUS she deserved the spotlight.
She taught me compassion and love
She taught me beautiful and ugly didn't come from the outside, but from the inside.
She is always there to pull me up on firm, dry ground, when I am in the lowest part of the mud.
She pushes me from mediocrity to full success.
She is the worker.
She is the woman behind you in the checkout stand
She has eyes that sparkle with love
She has the smile as gentle as a dove
She gave me her eyes, her smile, her heart.
She is beautiful
She is Pure
She is my Mother.

Breaking up is NOT the easiest thing to do... EVEN when YOU are the one making the decision...

I broke up with HIM

He doesn't understand why.

I told him it was because I wasn't in love with him and I was lying to myself by trying to convince myself of being in love...

NOTE: if you aren't in love with someone from the start of you dating them, YOU ARE NOT IN LOVE WITH THEM!!! You probably NEVER will be either...

But there is something else that I should have also mentioned to him...

My mind and passion was in it definately.. but my heart never was

I like the IDEA of being in love, and that is where we all are mistaken, we listen to our minds and lust rather than our hearts , which can lead to the biggest heartache of them all...

NOTE to readers: if you are victims to this... BREAK UP WITH THEM NOW or you will be married eventually and feel obligated to stay with them because of your children or it could lead to the biggest heartaches of them all...

Good Luck

Almost to the complete end of TOTAL childhood... or lack thereof

It is finally here...

I am now officially a senior, my childhood is almost finished...
I am happy yet sad because of that matter though...

You see, I don't remember all of my childhood, but the things I DO remember, were good for the most part, but, that is not why I am sad...
Childhood, gives you the complete leeway of being "childish", but my thing is having fun.
I am not entirely ready to be an adult, with their boring rules, organizations, and seriousness.... too many obligations for my taste.
Maybe this is the reason I love theatre so much... I can act like a child, act like an adult, dress up, and put on crazy make-up whenever I want to and no one can say I am acting too childish...
I am just like my mother in this aspect...
I don't think she ever learned to grow-up...

WE are the kind of people who are ALWAYS looking for something; looking for another meaning within a meaning, looking for another someone to help or to love (not be IN LOVE with), looking for someone to play around with, to laugh with, or even to cry with...
We never want to be alone, but yet when we are in a room with a million people, that is when we feel the loneliest.
We will cry just to let all kinds of feelings out at once...

That is my life, my childhood, and will probably be my adulthood...
I don't want to grow up in fear that I might run into my biggest fears like commitment and obligations
OR, maybe I don't want to grow up in fear of living day to day waiting for another place, another chance, or another day...

To all readers: Be who you want to be, and don't let ANYONE pull you down... because if you let them, it will just slow you down until you realize you need to get back up on your feet and go...

10 thing I HATE about people

1. They think they are smart but are some of them are the most moronic species to walk the earth.

2. The come up with the most ridiculous pet peeves or disgusts so they think they have to make a HUGE deal about it just to get there point across.

3. The only funny things they seem to be able to laugh at are death, sex, and dead babies.

4. They HAVE to dress nice just to make people believe they have a lot of money but people just end up thinking they are spoiled rotten brats and then go home to put something else on to look better than that person.

5. They say they are fat when the ONLY meat on their bodies ore the outer layer of skin covering up their bones.

6. Boys who wear basketball shorts ALL THE TIME and expect to get hugs from girls, when they clearly don't want to feel what they have below their wastes.

7. Boys who mistake shorts for pants and make sure everyone around them can see their boxers.

8. STUPID PEOPLE!!!

9. It is OK to get an abortion if you were raped.

10. People who wear clothes that are CLEARLY too tight for them. So tight that you can see the outline of their belly-buttons.

10 things I love about friends

1. They are ALWAYS there, even when you don't want them there.

2. They ALWAYS try to do whatever possible that will cheer you up, even when you couldn't go any higher.

3. They make you LOSE THE GAME!

4. They accept you for who you are, even if you are partially retarded, kill all the jokes (even those that were dead to begin with), and YES... even if you are Mormon. :)

5. They will put up with you even if THEY don't want YOU around.

6. They are you shoulder to cry on and you are theirs.

7. They tell you if you look fat or not and they are honest about it.

8. They will laugh at the fact that you wiped their "Ash Wednesday" cross off their heads because you didn't know anything about their religion and thought they had random dirt on their head that no one else would tell them about.

9. They will go to your all religious party even if they are the TOTAL opposite religion and STILL find fun in it.

10. They are the people you can talk to about ANYTHING, even if they don't like the subject, and STILL stick with you the rest of your life.


~P.S.~ I appreciate all my friends and will love you all no matter what... <3